Hello again friends, family and acquaintances, It's been more than 10 days since I last wrote. I would like to write more and especially to everyone who has written a note. I regret not being able to personally answer everyone who writes. Please understand though that any and all notes from all who have written have been truly appreciated. Also, many have forwarded bits of information regarding the whole range of treatments/therapies that are out there. Please believe me when I say that everything that has been sent has helped steer Nancy to better understand what all is going on and what all is out there to choose from. That includes everything from the pro-chemotherapy inputs to the very-unusual, never-heard-of options. Nothing much has happened to her in the past ten days. Most of the days seem to be "up" days and there are a few "down" days scattered in there. As she is trying to get her diet in line with a natural healing perspective, occasionally she has missed a meal or two and then she is very weakened and then tends to have a not-so-good day. Last week Thursday was not a good day. Then was when her hair started to significantly fall out. Also, we went back to the hospital for a blood test and found out that the chemo wiped out 90% of her white blood cells (WBC). They then wanted to give her some more chemicals (drugs) to boost her WBC count so that they could wipe them out again the next week with the next scheduled chemo treatment. (Please note, this is not my interpretation of it... that is exactly what they said.) Over the next five days her hair has continually come out by the brush full. Finally, Tuesday nite, so much was coming out that Nancy called the kids in so they could cut off her hair. The kids kind of enjoyed it. After they were done chopping I took a hair clippers and buzzed her hair to the skin. My son and I plan to do the same so that we all look alike. Rachel will be the only one with hair around here. The past 10 years has really prepared us for this trial. Eleven years ago we were happy little ducks sitting in a church pond thinking that all was cool. You know, where you think you've got the true church and you've got salvation wrapped up and everyone else is deceived and .... Well, events happened to us that made us question our position. Over the year we came to grips that the pond we were in wasn't as ducky as we had thought. After a few years of changing churches a few times we began to see the corporate church scene for what it was, i.e., a business, and that when people have beliefs that it often has nothing to do with the truth. Afterall, if I changed a belief and if I was wrong then, who's to say I not wrong now. We stopped being so smug and arrogant thinking that we had the truth when odds were strong that we would believe something else five years from now which would invalidate what we believed now. What a circle, 'eh? So, we believe something today that is different from what someone else believes. We believe it based on what life has dealt to us and based on what studies we made. Someone else believes something totally opposite but bases it on what life has dealt to them and based on what studies they made. Are either of us right? Do both of us have the truth? Odds are that neither of us is right. So, Nancy and I have come to a position recently where we realize that the odds are that what we believe may not be "the truth" but that also what others believe is probably not the truth either. In other words, we have a better respect for others' beliefs. (It's amazing what disfunctional church backgrounds will do to you!) So, how has that helped us for this trial? This same concept applies to sorting out and deciding on a treatment plan for Nancy's cancer. It seems that everyone loves Nancy dearly and that everyone wants Nancy to beat this cancer and come out on top. This is very good. She needs that love. But, not everyone agrees as to how Nancy should proceed on that victory path. And who is in the middle of all this disagreement? Nancy is. Everyone bases their opinions on what life has dealt them and what information, etc. they have been exposed to-Nancy included. Obviously here the problem with the disagreement is with those who want Nancy to go the conventional chemotherapy route and those who are strongly opposed to it (including Nancy). Here is an example of a point that is debated. Last update I mentioned a number. I said, "It turns out that long term percentages for complete remission following the conventional route are only in the 7% range." Instead of saying "complete remission" I might should have said, "complete cure" but the idea is still the same. We obviously want her to be completely cured as if she never had cancer. So, the chemo route people say that number is blatantly false, that it's much higher and the other side says that it is even smaller than that. I have looked at both sides of the issue. I have found that the pro-chemo route says that cure is 20% and some type of remission is 70-80%. Those are the numbers that Nancy's doctor specifically gave her. Various other pro-chemo sources give similar numbers. I have found out that these are statistics that are good for only 5 years. They don't tell you that right off. You have to read the fine print. I could not find statistics from their sources that would give long term results. I don't have the time or where-with-all to dig through piles of medical files. But there are sources that have looked deeper into those "facts". They say that after five years, the statistics plummet. These sources seem very credible and most of it makes much sense. For example, chemotherapy destroys dividing cells. That means cancer cells, hair follicle cells, gastro-intestinal tract cells and bone marrow cells. (Please bear with this simplified summary.) Since the bone marrow cells take their fair share of the brunt of the chemo attack, the immune system is dramatically damaged. Bone marrow cancer is one the side effects of chemotherapy but it is down the road and usually not within the first five years. That's why they don't list that as one of the possible side effects. They did say that if it gets real bad (not that it is a side effect) they may even have to do a bone marrow transplant. This and many other issues are not included in the information on the first five years. So, looking at the other side, the natural or "alternative" methods, there is a totally different approach. We have found that for those who are against the alternative treatments really don't know anything about any of them. They may have heard a horror story of someone who didn't succeed in that way coupled with the fact that the mass media puts a negative light on those methods. The motivation for such opposition is usually fear based which is usually ignorance based. The statistics for long term curing for most of the credible alternative treatments is always much, much higher than 7%. To put this another way, we believe certain things based on what life has dealt us and what bits of information we have studied. We tend to believe certain source to be more credible than others. Isn't that what we all do? Are any of us so immersed in all the medical facts to know for sure because we saw it whatever it is that we believe? I don't think so. The few that I know who are much more immersed than I fall on both side of the coin as well. So, what are we to do? It's rather simple, we go with what we believe and stop judging one another. That's the lesson we learned in the last ten years from all of our church shenanigans. What Nancy needs now is 110% support and love from everyone on all sides. That is the primary thing that will heal her. If anyone has doubts they are to keep them as far away from Nancy as possible. Nancy is the one with cancer and she has to go with what she believes. Her opposition to chemotherapy is so great that if she were to go that route, knowing of natural alternatives, her healing would be greatly hindered because of her opposition. Look here everybody, I have a chance of loosing a wife here. My fears are enormous but I must help her heal. This brings up another point. Nancy has been so natural based all her life and so anti-chemotherapy. Well, she landed in a hospital with cancer and with views that were not very kosher in that setting. I told her from the beginning that I will support her 110% with whatever decision she makes whether I agreed with it or not. Obviously she would get a lot of negative pushing against her position from the doctors. So, we set it up so that I would be the bad guy here so that she would be shielded from most of the negatives. That seemed to work as they were under the impression that I was making the decisions and making my wife go my route. Well, I received a lot of flack from them for a while. During that time, we were able to get Nancy from a state of wild fear of the chemotherapy to a decision of at least taking one dose and being nervous about it and finally to be at peace with it. This was good. Well, it seems now that some have thought that I am making Nancy go the alternative route. I can assure you that I'm not. I am doing the same as before. I am supporting her in what ever she desires as well as shielding her from most of the negative feedback. I try to share with her all that is going on emphasizing understanding with the various viewpoints that come at her. She seems to be doing fairly well, however, it is stressful just to know that disapproval exists. This is part of the reason that she needs our love and support 110% for what ever she decides so that she may be healed. So, her decision? She has decided to forego the conventional route. Of all the alternative treatments out there, two have seemed to rise to the top. One is promoted by Neways, International (http://www.neways.com- not a very good site) along with a very good book called, "Cancer, Why We're Still Dying to Know the Truth" by Phillip Day which can be found at http://www.credence.org. If anyone is interested in some of Nancy's thinking on the subject, you are encouraged to get this book. The other alternative treatment is one that is promoted by Dr. Richard Schulze. He has an "Incurables Program" that has a tremendously high success rate, especially for patients that have already been burned out by chemotherapy and radiation. To get information about his program (like get the tape called "Miracle" or other tape series) call 1-877-832-2463 or 1-800-437-2362. I could not find him directly on the web but I found an incurables program that is somewhat similar at http://www.healthfree.com/health/rescue/index.html. It is this latter option that Nancy has chosen. I have gotten most of the stuff we need and we should be officially starting it soon. Please, if anyone has misgivings about Nancy's choice, please, get the information about what she is doing so that you will be informed. There's nothing like opposition that really doesn't know what they are talking about. Anyway, I pray that I have offended no one. That is not my intent. I haven't said all that I would like to have nor in the manner that I would have liked but I believe it important to get this out without spending too much time on editing and proofreading. As we all know, we are talking here about my wife, Nancy, in a life and death situation. I will support her 110% whatever she decides. It is our hope that everyone will do likewise as we all witness her healing. Thank you so much everyone for your prayers and thoughts. It really is appreciated and does help. Love, Norman and family PS: As far as help, some of the obvious like cards and emails really does lift up Nancy's spirit. Emails can be sent to:n432r1@juno.com. Any cards or letters or anything else sent via the post office can be sent to: Nancy Brumm, Leflore, Oklahoma 74942. If anyone wishes to send anything via UPS or other method, contact me for an alternate address. |